28.11.08

Isn't the Cross sufficient?

You know ... I keep coming across stories of youth suicide ...

It's really getting to me. Some of these folk, you might expect it from. Their lives are full immorality and all kinds of junk that are sure to be the downfall of a man. But others, are professing Christians. That shouldn't be happening.

For instance, I recently read of a lad who committed suicide after being exposed to some atheistic propoganda, which some claim apparently hurt his faith enough to cause him to take his life. For sake of his integrity I do not want to link to the article.

Yet I researched the lad's name online, and though I found him to have a lot of political discernment, with concern on the standard Christian issues -- marriage, abortion and the like -- a truly intelligent young man -- I found his approach, largely appealing to the intelligence, and lacking in appeal to all things spiritual. As though he believed in God because he could prove God, and when someone with more years under his belt came along and outwitted him to disprove God, his foundation for faith crumbled.

This is why I must take such a careful approach to how apologetics are used. For to found a faith entirely on evidence is to be carnal, and to found it purely on presupposal is potential fantasy (you can presuppose anything!) Yet the stuff of true faith is, beyond both of these, supernatural. I cannot tell you completely what causes me to believe. It is not because I ignorantly choose to nor because I have been convinced by my eyes. I truly believe that my belief is a work of God.

I looked at this lad's life through tidbits he left in his wake (online,) and he spoke of heartache and drunkenness and though I am in no position to question his salvation, I certainly think that it wasn't any loss of faith alone that contributed to his eventual downfall. I know firsthand how emotions can play on one's desire to live. Heartache doesn't contribute to one's desire to live, and alcohol doesn't help either. Now, I think people make mistakes. I even believe it is possible for one of God's elect to be so overwhelmed that he might make a poor decision in a moment and take his life. Again, I do not claim to know who is saved. I can only look at the fruit.

I wonder -- If the assurance of salvation is in the fruit of the Holy Spirit, to be barren of that fruit, and uncertain of salvation, would no doubt also hurt ones assurance that there is a God. After all, one of the greatest evidences of Christianity is in changed lives; (I am speaking of the true church.) But to suggest that such a loss of faith is the result of a loss of external, scientific evidence is unfortunate. Because, again, in a debate a person needs not to suggest more truth -- only be a more influencial speaker. For instance, I heard it recently mused, "how can so many intelligent people follow Obama?" ... And for that reason. He is an influencial speaker. Hitler was an influencial speaker. He was not correct.

Yet Paul says this:
"For Christ did not send me to baptize but to preach the gospel, and not with words of eloquent wisdom, lest the cross of Christ be emptied of its power." - 1 Cor. 1:17

The gospel defends itself. The message of the cross in itself is mighty to save. How convincingly must we have it presented? Is there preached any other thing to draw men than Christ on the cross alone?

Friends, how can we have a Christianity if we are concerned about all of the aspects of Christianity -- all of the studies, the philosophies, the theologies, the apologetics, the political issues, if our own eyes and hearts are centered anything other than the cross itself? The wrath of God was poured out on Christ instead of us, on our behalf, that every person who believes might have fellowship with God eternally! This is the message that saves. Have we lost our focus?

There is nothing more humbling, and yet encouraging, to make us want to submit to God and yet live on for Him, than to remember His work. No political science or worldly relationship or other thing can take the place of the power of the cross. If we find ourselves unsatisfied with life, as though God has not "done enough" or as though the world is somehow too overwhelming with all of its temptations and earthly wisdom and its sin, can it be because our eyes are not upon that cross? Are we not a vapour, and yet God saw us important enough to sustain us? Then what fear in this world can we have!

My heart breaks for the discouraged, for those who somehow see it fit to end their lives, because it is as though we are still seeking the things of the world to give us satisfaction, (if not in our flesh, then in our minds and in our hearts) Yet with all of these things have we been commanded to love God!

We have parts of the body for the reason. We have those to run our discernment ministries and those to give us our defenses and those to guide us in political matters. We have the eyes and the hands and the lips and all of this works together. Yet what are any of these, if they are not guided by the head that is Christ, focused foremost on Him and His work, that there may be something to unite us?

I believe that there is something great happening. I know that God is calling many young men and women back to the truth. I say this not as a general statement but as something possibly unprecidented. And I wonder what God is preparing us for, and I wonder what great opposition we will face?

Were we ever called to lower our defense? Ought we not be prepared in all things and at all times? Not focusing on our worldly drama and our own shortcomings and doubts ... Is the cross not sufficient?

26.11.08

The other side of the Commandments ...

I had been contemplating something, a thought I found worthy of noting and sharing. It has a great deal to do with the concept that we ought not put a stumbling block before our brother, or encourage sin, but rather that we should encourage righteousness.

The classic example in scripture, posed in Romans 14, is the manner of Christian liberty. The example given deals a lot with meat sacrificed to idols. While this did not convict some Christians, it certainly convicted others. One man's liberty was another's sin. It caused the Gentile who was so used to doing this to worship his former god, to consider that perhaps he was still worshipping his former god. Thus he was guilty in his heart of breaking the first commandment because his unconvicted brothers in Christ preferred their liberty over his conviction.

Primarily, however, I think this issue addresses the commandments that pertain to other men. God does not encourage us to sin; yet how capable we are of encouraging others to sin! The commandments which pertain to men, being summarised as "love your neighbour as yourself," I think, are the ones Christ cited in Matthew 19:18-19. (There is an interesting reason he cited the ones he did, but I won't enter that tangent.)

What about "honour thy mother and father"? Perhaps we do this; we do well. Yet do we encourage our brothers to do the same? Moreover, what about those of you who are a mother or father. Do you, (while obeying God,) make yourself? Scripture admonishes the father not to provoke his children to anger. So on one side, the child must honour his parents, but I think it is also fair to say that the parents must raise and treat their children in a way that makes them honourable, with both love and dicipline, being honest and not deceptive, being rational and not emotionally driven.

Another example, (and I am speaking to my female friends primarily here.) It is commanded of us not to commit adultery, and Christ said that for one to so much as look at a woman with lust is adultery. It is easy for us to say, (and call it liberty,) "I will dress how I want. Men need to protect their eyes."

Oh, but God forbid any of us say that! For inasmuch as a man ought not look at a woman with lust, a woman should not make herself appealing this way. Why tempt your brother in Christ? Or don't you know that flashing cleavage and showing too much leg or midriff is all it takes to make a man's mind into a battlefield? Well, now you know and are without excuse.

If hatred is as bad as murder, do not provoke your brother to hate you! If it is a sin to covet, then do not build up yourself in a way that makes you enviable! And if is sin to steal, do not give your brothers in Christ reason to steal. Christ Himself says that we ought not refuse those who beg to take or ask to borrow. It is sin to speak a blessing on a person who is in need, yet not supply that need if it is within our means. It is not an excuse not to "feel" like doing something. How often I have seen people refuse to do small favours with no good reason.

It is a sin to bear false witness -- to lie. I think some people do this without even thinking, because it is a compulsive habit to them, and that is incredibly unfortunate. Yet there is another side to this, because again, a lie can be provoked. If you ask a loaded question, will a person not be tempted to lie? This also has application to gossip. Do you listen openly when a brother speaks out against another? You do not know if he speaks the truth; ask for evidence before you open your ears to juicy gossip and cause your brother (and yourself) to stumble.

These commandments are summarised as such: love your neighbour as yourself.

Do you make yourself lovable, though? Do you accept love from others? Do you accept gifts when offered? Do you speak to your brother and fellowship and tell them how you are doing?

Or do you draw back, presume that life is one-sided, and think that you can somehow love another without giving them an opportunity to love you back?

Despise none, but do not be dispicable either. Steal nothing, but neither be stingy. Do not lust, but neither be an object of lust. Love, but do not refuse love, either. Do not sin, but do not cause your brother to stumble, either -- for such would not be loving your brother, and in doing so, you have also sinned.

I understand that in some things, we can only do so much, and in others, we have reasons for holding back. We cannot be accountable for every single thing. Yet far too often, I think, we do not make ourselves lovable simply because we are too proud. And I do not think there has been a greater downfall of man than that.

21.11.08

Will you refuse...?

How often we read scripture and sit through a sermon, listening, thinking, "So-and-so really needs to hear this!" ... So focused on the wrongs we percieve in our brothers, we keep the words from penetrating Our own hearts, thereby refusing the council of God ...

But how can you ever council and love your brother who is at fault, if you cannot first walk with God and obey Him in these very same things?

I am speaking to myself here, (how terrible I am with this!) But I make my convictions known, hoping that you may also benefit.


... Consider another thing. When you admonish and council. Council and rebuke are good things, done for the right reason! But where is your heart? Are you arguing just to win? To profess a higher doctrine and show off wisdom and discernment? To impress?

... Or to proclaim the word of God with love and compassion, that hearts may be restored to Him?

Examine your heart!

I am also guilty of this.

I can't speak from personal experience on what exactly was the problem with the pharisees. Scripture makes it clear that there were probably a few things. But clear, above all else, was their sin in pride. They felt they upheld their law so well that they held themselves next to anyone else they could.

Pharisees picked up stones against sinners because their hearts were wicked and they were blinded.

Christ protected them from the wolves, then admonished them to go and sin no more.

How often I live out my walk for the external! I challenge the sin that can be seen yet ignore the unseen. I see to it that people will look and SEE the Christian, but how little they know of what goes on in my mind. And this is the very problem, the very essense of a cultural Christianity, where we walk so that our light is in the light but are darkness is in the darkness. Christ is light and there is no darkness in Him, says the apostle John. We cannot say we are without sin, but nor can we claim that the Truth is in us if we continue on in darkness, hatefully and unrepentantly.

Yet scripture promises that one day all things that happen in the dark will come to the light. Do you believe this?

Will we allow the Word of God to penetrate our hearts, or will we continue to focus on the external, the seen, and refuse the light that challenges our own darkness?

17.11.08

Undone.

I've got a lot of fear in my heart.

...Because I am not sure I have approached God the way I ought to have. His Spirit is in me -- I believe this firmly. Yet what have I done?

Cultural Christianity has had a grip on me, and I am still struggling to flee. I cannot struggle fast enough. Maybe that seems irrational to some of you, but I am truly coming undone, because I know that I have not used my Lord's name as I should have. I have not reverenced Christ as I should have.

Is His name really a thing for passing? Is it really a matter to joke about?

I have used "worship time" and my head was often everywhere but God. I was so distracted and captivated by my environment and how much "fun" I could have ... where was the actual worship part? So I flee from all "worship" that causes this. in me.

I have written quotes that I have supposed to be of God -- "prophecy" if you will -- even in this journal in the past. What if I have been wrong, however, and have approached this boldly, and this was not Him or of Him? I have done great injustice if so ... Either way, I have been too quick with my assumptions.

For instance: I have reflected on something I jotted in an old notebook, where I supposed that He was telling me that "Walking in the Light" meant to rejoice and be happy, to love with a joyful heart, to serve willingly, that all of this was the "fullness of His Spirit."

What is that ??

Isn't scripture clear that to walk in the light is to know the truth, to obey, and to be humble regardless of circumstance? Does not true joy and servitude and love flow out from these things, and ultimately from Him?

Maybe He does, in some sense, influence us. Maybe He "speaks" by reminding us of scripture. Perhaps His Spirit encourages our thinking. But can we claim a quote, verbatim? I fear that I may have overstepped my boundaries in presuming upon something that I really know little of.

I've been so irreverent!

... I am afraid to correct. I am afraid for my own reputation rather than for holiness.

I have made Him into artwork, as though He could be "made," as though this were a holy thing to do. I have reduced Him to an image.

How pride has blinded me. How many, worldly things have blinded me ...

How I've neglected to study His word properly. How I have sought to replace that with theory and emotion and celebration and idealisms, how I have been so overzealous (and now I understand how this is possible,) because I practiced such zeal without a proper understanding of His written will.

I am a Christian. I was so before. His Spirit has been with me for a little over two years. Yet I can scarcely keep up! I have ignorantly bought into so many misunderstandings. I have cursed Christian commercialism yet I have taken part. I have admonished others to take care how they use His name and make claims in His name, and yet I do the same. I have done so much in the name of teaching and preaching (is it even my place?) but my own practice falls miles short.

I am made to see that I am dust, helpless in my flesh were it not for His Spirit. I warn every true Christian who seeks after God, this: He will humble you. He will open your eyes. He will mess up everything you thought about the world and about yourself. He will break you. I do not say this on my own. It is very clear, if you pay attention to anything in your Bible. And I am experiencing it, now.

You will think you have it right, and He will show you just how far you are ... I will tell you plainly that knowing God's way is not an easy path. But it is the only true one.

... Oh, but praise Him for His grace and mercy! ... Who could encounter Him and still live to know Him were it not for that? Praise Him that His plan is perfect, because we are the furthest thing from perfection and would be so far away were it not for Him.

Soli Deo Gloria.

8.11.08

Putting the Pieces Together

There's something both frightening and refreshing about the way God works.

He takes control of a life. He puts you in places you'd never expect to be, with people you'd never fathom meeting, for reasons you cannot even begin to try to understand. It is frightening in the sense that you never really come to a complete understanding of what is going on or where you really stand, yet refreshing when you look and accept that God is still in control.

I cannot even begin to approach all of the things the Lord is doing. In the best analogy I can think, it is like a jigsaw puzzle without a reference picture. You start with a bunch of scattered and seemingly unharmonious pieces. You see, a jigsaw is not painted as it is pieced together; rather, the picture that was painted long ago and is simply slowly revealed to the person who has received it. We piece this together and sometimes mistake some pieces for going other places. We suspect some pieces of being missing because others keep getting in the way. Yet there is a crescendo, a finale, a final result that is most beautiful when seen in full, and we see that no piece was missing, or extra, or ever mistaken. God designed us in full from the very beginning, yet He chooses that we might see His design progressively, that He might grow us in faith and be glorified to the greatest extent.

That is where I am. I've got this puzzle (quite literally, my life,) and I hold the pieces, and God guides my hand according to His purpose. Pieces that I never thought were part of the big picture indeed are. Pieces I never thought would link are linked, and worlds meet. And some which I have thought to be linked in one place, they wind up in another. Some were for an entirely different purpose than I had ever fathomed. Sometimes I have started with the most unconventional, unlikely piece and more has built on it than I could ever see. I know the picture is coming together. I cannot yet claim the epiphany of knowing what it may altogether be, but there is that strange and sweet understanding that all of it is indeed here to fit together.

From the beginning. The churches in Pittsburgh. The jobs I had there. The friends and fellowship. The ministry work. The theological discernment and growth. Move forward - School at New Tribes Bible institute. The church in Waukesha. The folk I've met here. Move forward -- ???. I don't know. I still don't know! ... And yet I'm not worried, anymore. I don't feel the need to know, anymore. The progressive revelation God has given me is enough. Seeing His faithfulness, His response to prayer, a growing understanding of who He is ...

Fleshed out, this experience is filled with great providence, revelation, miracle, divine appointment ... (my vocabulary is sounding somewhat charismatic here, hah!) For instance, who knew that a girl whom I had casually crossed on deviantART, found on MySpace, and struck conversation with through MSN one day would come to be my roommate here at NTBI? I have had several tiny, insignificant inclinations and actions like this that have blossomed into the most tremendous changes.

None of this is of anything I've done. I am not painting this picture; God already has.



"Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know His voice
Who ruled them while He dwelt below."

- Katharina A. von Schlegel, "Be Still, My Soul"

5.11.08

Despite Obama ... Be Encouraged

I'm sure everyone has read and written quite enough about the political situation. Most of you know that I am a Christian. I didn't really like either candidate . Maybe I would have supposed McCain to be the lesser of two evils, though anyone I would have thought decent enough didn't stand a chance.

I didn't vote. Not because I didn't want to; I thought I had an absentee ballot, but I found out a day before the elections that it was only an application for an absentee ballot. I would have stood in line on election day to register, but I got intensely sick around Monday evening. Characterised by the usual, difficulty breathing, muscle aches, dry throat, runny nose. I wouldn't have wanted to wait two or three hours for registration like that. So the circumstances were against me. And really, I still hadn't decided whether to go with the "lesser of two evils" principle or to vote my conscience. Now it doesn't matter. Anyway ...

What I do want to throw out there, right now, are a couple of reminders for my fellow believers. Many of you, some who are dear to me, have become greatly discouraged by Obama's win. I agree that it is discouraging. I'm not going to engage in any political debates, but morally speaking, Obama is really not who I would have wanted, either. However, what is done is done, and God is sovereign, and before we ever even cast our ballots, God knew that this would come about, and He allowed it to be! And if I may dare tiptoe through the TULIP with you for a moment, I also remind you that despite whatever "change" will come about because of who America elects, it is those whom God elects that know true change. There is no presidential leader that can come into this nation and add, remove, change or reform anything that will solve the problem of humanity. To think as much would be humanistic at the very least. If you do not know God, then even national crisis is a moot point next to your own depravity. Only the Holy Spirit can bring about the sanctifying change we truly need.

That said, every true believer needs to remember this: God is seated on the throne. The deal is as good as finished; one day Christ will return for His church! Our citizenship is not of this world but of His Kingdom. All of this may sound rather cliche to anyone who's been a Christian long enough, but actually dwell on it! What can man, (even a president) really do to you? Does he have dominion over your soul or anyone's? Do not fear our leadership; fear God, and pray for our leadership.

Yes, I said pray.

"First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way." - 1 Tim 2:1-2

Paul wrote this to Timothy when Nero was in power. Nero! If Paul, by inspiration of the Holy Spirit, could say as much for Nero (who did great things against the Christians,) then we can certainly say as much for any leader of this country.

Be careful how much time you spend complaining. If you choose to discuss politics with others, do not be foolish in your discussion, reverting to insults and blind speculations, but educate yourselves on what you discuss and be respectful. Most importantly, do not allow all of it to cause you to lose sight of God and His sovereignty. Do not cease to praise Him. Do not stop bringing your desires before Him! Don't allow your skepticism to cause you to forget that He is in control.

And pray for our brothers and sisters in Christ, that they may remember to do the same.

So, yes. Barack Obama may promise "Hope" and "Change" ... Let him. Our King gave us this long ago.

Love you guys. Be wise.

2.11.08

Depicting Christ?

All personal issues aside ... heh.

I'm learning things for the first time, some new things, some things to simply a greater extent, that I don't even know I can write them all. I might offend some of you. (... But wait! No one reads this. Haha.)

Something specifically that I wish I could publish on my deviantART site is a conviction that will make me sound either Amish or Puritan to some of you. But it is the issue of depicting Christ. In few words, I am convicted and repenting of this. I shouldn't have been doing it!

Why? It is simple. Christ is God, and God is spirit. It is true that Christ came in flesh, but did even one of us physically witness that? If not, by whose illustration can we say we have seen Him face to face? Not by the Bible, certainly; not by the Spirit (unless we are Paul.)

Look at the Ten Commandments. The second commandment (it's been trunciated into the first if you are Catholic,) speaks all about this:

"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me; And shewing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments." - Exodus 20:4-6

I do not believe this commandment (as the Amish may imply) is saying that we cannot make artwork of God's creation. I do not think that children were stoned if they drew a picture of their pet lamb. Don't misunderstand me. It is clear that the context is referring to the golden idols that many had.

Traditionally, we think, "well yeah. They made statues and called them gods. That's absurd!"

That's true, to an extent. But look at the history, for a moment:
- Who was this speaking to? The Israelites.
- What were the Israelites doing? Leaving Egypt.

... So let me shine a little light on something about Egypt. Before I knew Christ, I was quite captivated in Egyptian mythology. It's not hard to tell. I knew a lot about the deities. At my lowest, I prayed to one of them a few times. I did not think that my statue of Bastet was literally Bastet. I understood it to be a representation of someone that (I had hoped) may actually exist.

The Egyptians actually believed Bastet to be a real, living being in the flesh. They believed this to some level about most of their deities. They depicted her because they thought she could be depicted.

... But let me ask. Can God, who is spirit, who cannot be contained because his existence is infinite in both time and space, be depicted? We can't wrap our minds around that; how can we wrap our pencils around it? I speak the same for every story and allegory that attempts to depict more than an aspect of God. Can God be guessed as a thing of literature might? Can we presume to know what God would say or do in a fictional circumstance? If you can assume God into fiction, I question the depth of your real relationship with Him ... Because lately, I tremble when I compare the God I know to the God I once tried to insert in my fictional works.

Again, folk will say, "but Christ DID come in the flesh! Why can't we draw Christ then?"

My conviction stands firm. I wasn't there. You weren't there. No one here is that old. I absolutely believe that Christ walked on earth in the flesh; I do not presume to know what He looked like, however, and because He is my Lord, I do not think it is my place to presume upon a thing. There is no crime in depicting flesh, but when that flesh is God incarnate, the Lord who was crushed to redeem me, are my hands truly worthy of that? I think a few children's books illustrations can be spared for the sake of not treading on something that may not be my place. The bottom line is that if we truly believe that Christ is God, then why depict Him when God has commanded we should make no such idols -- (being images that represent a deity.)

If nothing else, consider this. Many people have the inclination to want to revere an image and base their idea of God on that image. (Look at how they do!) It's really not worth that stumbling block. There are better ways to honour Christ than drawing Him. Especially those who make light of their images of Him.

Now, to those of you who disagree -- and of you there may be many -- I know I will probably hear your thoughts on this.

But my real concern is this. For those of you who share my convictions ...

Why did you say nothing to me when you saw me doing this?